2023 in Review

At the Mountains of Madness by H.P. Lovecraft

Lovecraft mainly has cosmic horror short stories, so when I read this a while back, it stood out to me because of its length. Its length was also the reason it took a few years for it to get published. The novella was eventually published in 1936 and encompasses the mystery, wonder, and fear of the unknown that was still active in the 20th century as Antarctica was being explored.

The plot follows an expedition into Antarctica by the fictional Miskatonic University. The expedition splits into two groups, one led by Lake and the other by the narrator. Lake’s group finds the mountains and mysterious specimens, and this information is relayed over the radio until suddenly Lake and his men stop communicating and disappear. The narrator’s squad is then tasked to find out what happened and go to the mountains, where they discover an ancient civilization and the horrors that lie within.

The story is intriguing and has an enduring influence. As the narrative is composed of expedition logs and insights into a new world, it has the legacy of inspiring some science fiction. Even though Antarctica is on our world, it is so remote and cold that it feels alien. The expedition narrative is also a unique way to establish fear and develop how the horror is built up over time. I think this novella would be useful to study in a Creative Writing class for world building or the horror genre. In general, Lovecraftian horror has a cultural foundation. The shoggoth’s many eyes instantly remind me of Skyrim’s Hermaeus Mora, and if you look hard enough, I’m sure you’ll find evidence of Cthulhu mythos in many more movies and games.

Devil in a Blue Dress by Walter Mosley

This book was utterly life changing.

I had seen the 1995 film while in college before the pandemic and absolutely loved it as a modern film noir. The tropes that come with the genre, femme fatales and the narration of a man wrapped up in trouble, are suspenseful and intriguing. I didn’t even know the film was based on a book, and when I learned that information, I immediately ordered a copy.

Walter Mosley masterfully crafts his characters and dialogue. The term “page turner,” for me, exclusively applies to his work. The tension in his writing is gripping, and Mosley explores race, gender, class, and all aspects of American culture and history in intensely powerful ways. Devil has a special place for me as the introduction to Mosley’s writing, but his “White Butterfly” and “Gone Fishin’” are even better in my opinion. (My Gone Fishin’ Essay)

The protagonist, Easy Rawlins, and his foil, Mouse, are two of my favorite characters in literature after diving deep through the mystery series. After reading Devil and its sequel, “A Red Death,” I’ve been sold on every Easy Rawlins project. In 2023, I read six of Mosley’s novels in this series, and it will be hard to catch up as the series is ongoing with the 2024 addition, “Farewell, Amethystine.”

The Witches of Eastwick by John Updike

I found this book so interesting that I wrote a research paper on defecation and American culture based on it. You heard that right. This novel stood out because it is self proclaimed as “sexy and hexy,” and witches are an intriguing concept.

The Witches all have magical powers, however, I would say these are used sparingly but effectively in the book. What we see them do more commonly throughout their days are what I would call Creative Powers. Each witch specializes in an art or craft in which they create something. Alexandra creates little sculptures, Jane plays the cello, creating intense, passionate music, and Sukie is a writer who creates articles for the newspaper. 

I would argue that Updike is painting the creative powers as their own individual strengths and their “real magic” in life. In the narrative, Darryl Van Horne pushes them to use their creative powers more. In some ways, they experience artistic or character growth through the success or failure of his male encouragement. Supposedly some critics have called the book misogynistic, but Updike himself said it was a book of female power. I believe Updike’s words, as while Darryl does encourage the artistic skills of the women – he doesn’t actually possess any himself. His mansion is filled with strange art, and in many ways he is a collector. I believe he collects art and takes so much interest in the artistic abilities of the women, because he lacks any ability to be artistic himself.

This is summed up on page 299 by Alexandra. “He couldn’t create, he had no powers of his own that way, all he could do was release what was already there in others. Even us: we had the coven before he came to town, and our powers such as they are. I think he wanted to be a woman, like he said, but he wasn’t even that.” 

Through the coven, the women have witchcraft and supernatural abilities, but they have creative and real abilities as well. The ending has some ramifications for gender dynamics in America, because the man doesn’t possess a profound artistic ability. Perhaps that says something about how things like writing have been gendered away from men.

The Blood of Flowers by Anita Amirrezvani

This historical fiction takes the reader to Persia, or 17th century Iran. The location, culture, and traditions are vastly different compared to 21st century America, which make it an enjoyable read, but the rigidness of family, class, and arranged marriages can come off as frustrating. The author highlights some of the nuance to social class and gender by showing the power that women have in their households.

Rug making is the principle focus of the work; a carpet is in the service of beauty. For the carpet to have been dyed and created, a field of flowers has to be sacrificed. The artistic process and one’s emotional connection to their art was displayed excellently within this work. The narrator, a young woman, is talented in the painstaking process of creating Persian rugs through dyeing and weaving. Artistic creation is given a mythic, fairy-tale quality through the occasional insert of a third-person Persian legend chapter that helps frames the narrator’s journey and emotions. It is devastating to witness the naive failures of the narrator and triumphant to see her successes.

When a legendary one liner appears in a book, I’ll often make a note of it. “Reveal all that is hidden in your heart for only then will you be cured” appears towards the end. In living with an unrelated, incurable chronic illness, the quote has stuck with me as a life lesson. Everyone should strive to be authentic, even if it is painful to do so, because authenticity is healing.

Alrighty Aphrodite by Peach Pit

The signature hook, “Well, alrighty, Aphrodite,” is a wonderful blend of alliteration and allusion that also gives the song its title. Greek mythology is pervasive and culturally relevant in our society, many centuries after these gods and goddesses were originally conceived. Aphrodite is essentially the goddess of beauty, love, and sex. No mortal man would intentionally deny himself from being with this goddess; however, the speaker dismisses her with a calm “alrighty” as he sees her for what she really is. The dismissal of Aphrodite in the song’s title and hook is a rejection of the esteemed status imposed on a lover who doesn’t deserve it. 

With the line, “Little pearl you think you’re in gold, but I can see the dirt in your lines,” the speaker is waking up to reality; he can acknowledge the flaws in her personality which now outweigh her overwhelming, god-like beauty. The first stanza’s line “If the ocean’s not enough, nor am I” is quite powerful. Oceans make up the majority of our world and are endless to the eyes on the horizon. This line implies that even this vast and complete sea isn’t enough for the “Aphrodite” in this relationship, and that she can never be satisfied. She will always be looking for more, meaning the speaker and every other man she tries to be with will always not be enough.

Tomorrow Never Came by Lana Del Rey and Sean Ono Lennon

From her large list of poetic work, I wouldn’t even say “Tomorrow Never Came” is one of my top 5 songs of Lana’s, but it impacted me quite strongly in 2023. This somber duet with Sean Ono Lennon is a masterpiece and an emotional narrative that tells a full arc of love and loss between two speakers in a relationship that ends in tragedy. 

Lana and Sean sing a duet where their characters, in love, were to meet on a park bench. The first time this verse appears, Lana sings it alone – suggesting she arrived to the bench first and is waiting for her lover. This image is in the “pouring rain” to add to the somber tone, but out of love, any storm could be endured. “Tomorrow never came” comes down to the fact that her lover never showed up – that she was on that bench, in the rain alone, forever.

The second verse has both Lana and Sean singing about the bench, which to me suggests that they’re actually in love and wanted to see each other, but just went to different benches: essentially a metaphor for miscommunication. A relationship with a guaranteed tomorrow can be there, but the foundation can wash away if people misinterpret words, directions, or cues. It is quite tragic to think that they could’ve been sitting only a block or two away from one another or that one message could’ve changed the course of a relationship. 

I Don’t Wanna Be An Asshole Anymore by The Menzingers

Punk rock music has increasingly become one of my favorite musical genres over the last few years. Growing up in society, masculine emotion is generally something that is brushed under the rug. I feel like this genre really captures the turbulent feelings of male emotions with its intense vocals and driving instrumentation.

The repetition of “I’ll be good, I’ll be good, I’ll be good” in a climatic moment of the song pushes the main idea of the song to an extreme. It isn’t asserted once, but over and over again in attempt to convince the lover, and the speaker himself, of his change. I think this plays into the idea of believing it to make it happen or faking it until you make it. If the speaker says it enough, it will become true, and ultimately, he can and will be “Good”. I am fond of the alliteration towards the end of the song when he says the situation is a “Tangle of thorns.”  This circles back to the beginning of the song and how her “heart ache” is a “garden”. It conjures imagery of Eden or roses, a paradise for their love, but the speaker is a thorn that punctured their love and ruined it. 

You’ll Never Be the Best at Anything You Try (Surely Not) by Short Fictions

While music always plays a significant part of my enjoyment in a song, I usually focus on the lyrics. In this instance, I focus less on the lyrics and more on the music itself, as there is a long musical introduction and conclusion. The song is unique as it manages to convey both a somber and triumphant mood simultaneously. It crescendoes to its conclusion after acceptance is achieved by the speaker: “I never said we had to be best.”

The lyrics address the challenges of young adulthood, marking that “I never thought at 23 I’d feel this bad” and previous suicidal thoughts with the line, “And all the time that I spent wishing I were dead.” These instances contribute to the somber tone lurking in the background of the song, but the pulse is always driving forward towards acceptance and a “life that’s worth living.”

The title is one of the longest titles for a song that I’ve ever seen, and I respect the unique artistic choice in doing that. The album art is also beautiful, making this song an excellent part of my 2023 experience.

Handwritten by The Gaslight Anthem

The song has an undercurrent of longing. Humans yearn for connection because we often feel alone. The opening of the song addresses this with, “I know there’s someone out there feeling just like I feel.” This sentiment is developed later on in the song with the verse, “There’s nothing like another soul that has been cut up the same.” I really like that line as it invokes the feeling of soul mates, but it doesn’t suggest that soul mates are just born that way. Life “cuts us up” which is a striking and sad image. Life hurts us and beats us down, but that is what molds us. If we find another soul who has been molded by similar struggles, there will be true understanding. 

The following verse, to me, suggests that understanding doesn’t need spoken words: “And did you want to drive, without a word in between? I can understand, you need a minute to breathe.” I like the idea that sometimes connection is silent and that pain or experience can’t easily be vocalized. The chorus, “Pages plead forgiveness. Every word handwritten” is very poetic, and can probably be interpreted many ways. It can be easier to write things down than to say them.

Acoustic #3 by The Goo Goo Dolls

Anyone who is close to me knows that I like The Goo Goo Dolls (a little too much). “Big Machine” and “Iris” are two of my favorite songs, ever. Their influence is enduring, but I have vivid memories of listening to Acoustic #3 in the car at night while driving home from D.C. The song is exclusively played on an acoustic guitar, and it has a mellow, sad tone, yet it is also ethereal and calming. Listening to it for the first time hit me like a truck in the best possible way.

A juxtaposition of feeling is created because the familiarity and softness of an acoustic guitar come off as reassuring, but lyrics like “What’s the point in ever trying? Nothing’s changing anyway” are the opposite. The poetic line, “And the least they ever gave you was the most you ever knew” show how a lack of care or low expectations can have an impact on a child.

I adore the subtle changes from stanza to stanza. In the beginning, the speaker provides a warning: “When the world gets in your way.” We have dreams, but will we be able to achieve theme? By the end, failure and “falling” have happened “Cause the world gets in your way.” The world’s oppressiveness and uncaring nature have shifted from a potential obstacle to the reason or explanation for the current sadness.

Chemtrails Over the Country Club by Lana Del Rey

For much of the year, I was obsessed with the Honeymoon album and its seductive songs like Religion or Freak, but as the year wrapped up I was drawn to this song and found it immensely interesting. 

There is a looking backwards perspective present in the song. In the repeated line, “There’s nothing wrong, contemplating God” I focus heavily on the word contemplation. When this is tied in with the line “Like when we were kids”, the song is focusing on childhood and the moments that led to the present. Divinity is present with the mention of God, mankind and technology are present with the mention of chemtrails that come from planes, and the hierarchy of wealth in society is present with the mention of country clubs. How do all these factors combine and do they even matter in the end?

The chemtrails themselves have a majestic presence over the song. Not only are they the title that looms over the album, but they are are the repeated chorus. The juxtaposition of prepositions, “UNDER” the chemtrails “OVER” the country club is striking, but positions the listener and the speaker underneath these lines in the sky. Whether they are divine or manmade, they are above us and supernatural in a way. I love how that is contrasted with mundane, everyday actions in Lana’s verse, “Washing my hair, doing the laundry, late night TV, I want you on me.” Life goes on regardless of whatever is going on in the world or above us; some of the most beautiful moments are the mundane ones.